Be a pal in deed to a single ma

The financial industry relies heavily on statistics to give us an overview of how people are coping moneywise.

Stats released by Eighty20’s Credit Bureau data revealed that single mothers have it the worst.

With all due respect, we don’t need stats to tell us that!

The data shows that there are around 8.8 million single mothers in South Africa.

They are also the most likely to turn to unsecured credit for personal loans, payday loans and credit card debt.

With 60% of households being fatherless, all financial responsibilities fall onto the mother (and possibly her family).

Tyme Bank stats reveal that 80% of women budget.

They do so because they have to juggle their money to feed everyone and ensure that all necessities are met.

I was a single Cape Flats mother for nearly 10 years, so I know what I am talking about when I say the struggle is real.

I have been in the personal finance industry for many years now.

At one point, I was in charge of the Western Cape arm of a project set up by the Department of Trade and Industry (DTI) and the Credit Ombudsman to look at the availability and accessibility of financial information to ordinary South African consumers. I have gone from there to financially inform and educate our communities as best I can.

That is why I get irritated when stats are released and interpreted by people who have never lived through what they are supposed to be experts in.

Glossy, chirpy people who are not over-indebted and have savings and investments that they can draw from at any time, are handing out financial advice to us.

But they have seldom experienced our struggle and necessary hustle, and therefore can’t properly connect with what our financial needs are.

Lately, we have also had a flood of social media influencers tell us to simply think positively and believe in ourselves.

They tell us to smile, give off positive vibes and everything in the world will be just fabulous!

I find this highly problematic, because while a positive mindset is hugely beneficial, it doesn’t put food on the table.

It doesn’t make more money available for school uniforms, school transport, electricity or any other needs.

We need to stop telling poor women to smile their way to financial freedom.

We need to start helping out in small ways which can ultimately make a big difference.

Offer to fetch the children of a single mother from crèche or after-care in time, so that she doesn’t have to pay late penalty fees.

If you are cooking for yourself and you have extra to spare, send some over to the single mom who works until 7pm, still has to take public transport home and then cook supper.

If you are walking your own child to school, offer to do the same for her child.

That peace of mind she will have through the entire day is priceless.

Don’t wait for her to ask.

Pride and embarrassment are often stumbling blocks to a single mother in need.

Don’t judge. Offer your help freely and unconditionally.

There are a lot more tips to give and, sadly, they will all be open to some form of criticism.

Single mothers are struggling and communities, corporates, government and financial institutions all have a role to play to make things better.

With elections coming up, speak to your ward counsellor about skills development programmes for women in your community and hold them accountable to find access to jobs, internships and programmes around the city, even if it only pays a stipend.

If you work for a private company, enquire about their corporate social responsibility projects and explore how your community can benefit from it.

Approach churches, mosques and community groups who might have access to space for educational talks and workshops.

Compile a list of the women in the community who have small businesses. Put it in a WhatsApp group and actively support them.

Share important information and contact details.

We don’t need more financial jargon and judgemental tones.

People need to know how to spot financial scams and dodgy pyramid schemes, the dangers of high interest rate loans, so that when a money lender calls and offers a much needed loan of R1000, they don’t end up paying R6000 back!

Know that you have the right to a free credit report from every credit bureau once a year and that it is your right to seek the services of a debt counsellor when a creditor issues a letter of demand.

Be aware that your child’s report can’t be withheld for unpaid school fees and that you can apply for school fees exemption at any time during the year.

Single or not – now is the time to support each other and become financially aware.

We can either help each other rise or watch each other fall.

The choice is ours.

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