Hello my good people, because the Premier League has been on hold with the queen passing (and the international break), football journalists have been scrambling for stories and making up k@k as they go along!
One of the best bits of ‘news’ that was dished up last week was the ‘Romelu Lukaku back to Chelsea’ exclusive.
I mean, do they really believe we’re that stupid? The short of it was: “Now that Thomas Tuchel has gone, the striker might have a chance of a return to Stamford Bridge”. Might have a chance?
FFS, I might have a chance of becoming Elon Musk’s official bum wiper… it ain’t gonna happen though.
And after his poor performances for the Blues (and disrespectful words in an interview), why the hell would the club want him back? Not least the fans. That would be like inviting the Gupthas to South Africa to sort out the Eskom crisis.
But it gets worse! According to football news outlet Calciomercato, new Chelsea boss Graham Potter is in love with Harry Kane and wants his board to land the England striker at the end of the season. The plan to tempt Tottenham involves Romelu Lukaku and a lorry load of cash!
Come on guys, that’s just ridiculous… nearly as stupid as the situation Leicester City reportedly find themselves in. I had no idea that (according to the Sun newspaper) only Pep Guardiola, Jurgen Klopp and Antonio Conte earn more than Brendan Rodgers, who still has three years remaining on his deal!
Despite cashing in on a couple of players during the window the Foxes apparently can’t afford the £10million they need to pay him off to leave. So now what? Sit it out and get relegated?
By the way I think they’re far too good to go down. These “stories” are almost as stupid as spending £30million on a 30-year old midfielder (read Casemiro), believing he should actually be allowed to step on a Premier League pitch, let alone play in a match.
My goodness, he looks like a banged up old truck with a slow puncture. In fact, checking his face, he could be one of Cristiano Ronaldo’s old drunk uncles, or an ‘FN Rangers’ over-40 player arriving drunk for training.
It’s amazing what a break in football does! And then suddenly you think to yourself, the Fifa World Cup starts in eight weeks! Huh?
How did that suddenly happen? In the middle of the frikkin season… it’s mental.
On that note, the Brazilians look formidable, hard to find a chink in the team…
Will coach Adenor Leonardo Bacchi be able to bring the glory back after 20 years? And will Gareth Southgate at some stage mould the fantastic squad of players he has into a half-decent footballing side?
Jeeeez, they’re rubbish…Yes, we all know the Uefa Nations League is about as important as the Charity Shield, but with eight weeks to go, surely the players would want to produce strong performances in the hope of a World Cup call-up? And how the hell is Southgate still in that role anyway?
Of course the papers have been going nuts since the ‘Three Lions’ were relegated last week and according to the bookies, Chelsea boss Graham Potter is favourite to take over, but why does the FA continue to encourage safe, pedestrian football with a team littered with talented players?
I’ve always said Arsene Wenger would be a brilliant appointment (it’ll never happen). Knows the English game inside out, he’s a great ‘man-manager’ and has inspired some of the best looking football we’ve ever witnessed.
But no, we go for some muggy knob who hasn’t got the balls to encourage players to express themselves. It’s horrible.
Why in God’s name England are second favourites to lift gold in the desert goes beyond me.
Is it because they came close in the Euros? Whatever it is, I hope I’m wrong and the lethargic Nations League outings are what they are, meaningless.
Anyway, back to business and a couple of belters this weekend, kicking off at lunchtime on Saturday with the North London Derby, and on Sunday, the Mancs battle it out at the Etihad! Stay good people, chat next week, bye byeee.
dailyvoice@inl.co.za